Monday, 9 March 2009

O. M. G.

What a day it has been. Here is how it went for me today so far....

I took the kids to school as normal. Biggest girl had a hissy fit because it rained five minutes before she walked to the bus stop to catch her bus to school. I said I would drive her, because it was pissing down, and she got me in a weak moment. (the rain only lasted five minutes, but by then the bus had gone)

That's fine. I drop the three of them off at their three bloody schools. Come home and tidy up a bit. Sit down to check the emails and my friend nudges me on MSN and we play a couple of games of Spider Solitaire.

Just getting to the good bit.

I hopped up to go and have a shower and get ready for the funeral that I had to attend this morning - I went into my room, realised that my top was in the basket out here in the living room. Walked to get my phone on the computer desk to message my daughter and there IS A FRIKKING HUGE SNAKE BETWEEN ME AND THE COMPUTER. Well, about a metre long... that's frikking huge in my books. It was a Red Belly Black snake. Which are venomous in case you didn't know. IN MY FRIKKING LOUNGE ROOM.

O. M. G.

So of course I panicked.

What else would you expect me to do.

Here I am. Seventy minutes before I have to leave for a funeral and not only have I not had a shower, but there is a FRIKKEN SNAKE in my living room and there is no way in this wide earth that I was walking past it to go out my front door!!!

I get straight on the phone and ring my friend and she calms me down (somewhat) and starts making phone calls for me to find a 'snake guy'. We find one and then the excruciating fifteen minute wait til he gets here....

He came.

He got it.

I am still shitting myself.

Every where i look i expect to see a snake.

Who was that guy who drove all the snakes out of Ireland. I need him.

Now I want to sell up and move.



The funeral.

It was beautiful. It was beautiful and sad - but very beautiful for a woman who had lived a long life and had great grandchildren to prove it.

Freaky bit was, she was one of 14 kids and some of her sisters were there - one of them in particular was the spitting image of her. Freaky.

As i mentioned the other day - she was famous for her sandwiches for after church services - and the most poingnent moment for me was when we walked into the reception room afterwards and there were trays and trays of sandwiches just like she used to make. That made me a little misty.

It was nice to catch up with some people that I have not seen in ages. Some that were very good friends that I have drifted apart from. Lots and lots of hugging and cheek kissing was done today.

Farewell Gwynnie.

You will be sorely missed, but we know you are just beyond the veil and we will see you again one day.



Natalie said...

I guess when you said you wanted a man with a big snake, you didn't mean a black and red one? Lol.


Funeral Was indeed beautiful.xx

Jen said...

... not funny Nat... lol

it was a FRIKKEN SNAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!


Michelle said...



So, wanna swap houses??

Kathleen said...

I am glad you survived your encounter with the red belly black ... what a message before Gwynnie's funeral! xxxx

Natalie said...

Just trying to cheer you up, love. Soz.

Anonymous said...

Shit! I would have crapped myself too. Eeerk...

Anonymous said...

OHH poor Jen I would die if a snake turned up at my house ,,, How are ya sweetie pie , I will call in soon to the cottage and say hi ,,miss you all sooo much I have lots of news vick x

Jen said...

'sok Nat... just kidding .. :D

yes everyone - i frikken shit myself.

VICKI!!! How good is it to hear from you.
Yes you had better pop in - but make sure you let me know when you will be popping in!!

Kathleen - hmmm, make me think why dont you... hmmm funeral is transformation. Snakes are healing. Thinking...

Self-Proclaimed Mistress of Nothing said...

A poisonous snake? In your living room? Did you have trouble sleeping after that? Geesh, I would have gotten those phantom creepy-crawling feelings after that... of something slithering across me. Egads! I'm glad you are safe. :-)

The Tall Red Head said...

Fuck me Dead. I would have died on the spot. It wouldn't have had to bite me. Scary scary scary.

Glad the funeral was lovely. It is good when some happiness can be taken from a sad day.

Lisa said...

friggin hell Morgs- a snake and a funeral.shitz !!

Anonymous said...

OMG is right! I am not afraid of many things, but snakes TERRIFY me! I always assume they move MUCH faster than they do, so I would have been afraid to even use the phone in case I pissed him off! Mr Snake and I would have stayed in our places for HOURS staring at each other! YIKES!

Glad the funeral was a nice tribute. She sounds like she was a much loved woman.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

I love snakes, but venomous ones in my house wouldn't be a welcome sight. When I was pregnant with Sissy, I had a baby snake fall on my head (it was on the roof and I was entering the house). People around here are superstitious and got all nervous. I just took pictures of him. He was so cute (and not venomous).

Anonymous said...

Freaking hell Jen!!!!!!!!ST. Patrick is the guy by the way.
Bloody Red Belly black snake...I would have kaked my pants and then some.....w.w.

Vevay Anderson said...

I had a nightmare about snakes after I read this post!