Wednesday 30 March 2011

Woo Hoo!!!!

Airlie is amazing today. She is sitting up, talking, she even went for a walk!!! They are just waiting for a bed for her in the ward, C3 most likely, and she is outta Intensive Care!!! Woo Hooo!!!! Open-mouthed smileOpen-mouthed smile

Thank you SOOOOOO much for all your support and well wishes. We are really ou t of the woods now Smile

Update:

Airlie decided that she had had enough of the air tube last night, and decided to pull it out. It was a bit early, they would have done it today anyway, but were kind of waiting for the doctor to come and do it!! lol

Anyway, she has been breathing unassisted all night without the tube and is still on the improve, so thankfully all is well. It seems that she very well my move out of intensive care into a ward this afternoon some time...

thanks for your support guys, it is really appreciated. xoxo

Tuesday 29 March 2011

Some good news!!

some good news!! Just called the nurse that I spoke to last night and she said the swelling has reduced significantly overnight!! She can see the back of her tongue now, where before there was no gap between her tongue and the roof of her mouth. Her temp is now low grade too!! She still has a swelling under her chin, which is directly under the piercing - so yeah, woo hoo!!! some really good news!! 
Thanks so much for all of your support
xoxoxo

Monday 28 March 2011

my baby girl

oh my baby
i love you sooo much, from here to the moon and back an infinity times.
I stand by your bedside and i see you there, all filled with tubes and wires and needles and I feel absolutely distraught. You are there, with all those strangers, who are catering for your every need. Who are wiping your mouth, and smoothing your brow. Who are there when you are distressed and there when you are content.
I call in.. around the times i can due to work… because if i didn't work then i couldn't pay the rent. So I work, and i go there and i feel sooooo small. I feel soooooo helpless. My love for you isn't enough. It always used to be. Now not at all.
You are paying a huge price for the choice to be an individual. You are totally unique and this was a way for you to express that. It has gone horribly wrong.
I would swap places with you in an instant. I would give all i had for you to be well and happy. You are my world. You are my life. You are my everything. Along with your sister and brother, you are my reason for being.

The news this evening is a little more encouraging. It seems that the swelling is due to an allergic reaction. So, we just wait for the body to give up fighting…. it seems it is already giving up the fight, with a tiny improvement in swelling this evening. Her nurse said he could see a gap in her mouth, between her tongue and the roof of her mouth, that wasn't there at 1pm today. So this is good. The specialist called in, had a feel around, and said she thought the swelling had reduced a bit too.
HOPEFULLY she has turned a corner.
I am SURE it is to do with the outpouring of love and healing and best wishes that is coming from everywhere right now. Keep up the good work guys. it is making a difference.
Thank you so much
from the bottom of all our hearts
thank you
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Airlie and her bestie Stace xoxo

Sunday 27 March 2011

please send love and healing

My gorgeous daughter Airlie decided to go and get some silly tongue piercing yesterday….

Her body rejected it in a big way. Her neck, throat and tongue has swollen to incredible proportions, this afternoon she had to have surgery to put a tube in place down her nose to ensure her airway doesnt get blocked altogether.

Consequently, she is in Intensive Care in John Hunter Hospital, and being kept heavily sedated, ie comatose, until the swelling goes down.

I am kind of in an ok place wit h this, i know she is in the absolute right place, and that air can get to her lungs if it swells further.

I am hoping this will be a bit of a wake up call for her, maybe the piercings etc are not all a good idea…. her lifestyle has been a bit extreme lately (well for the past two years).

 

She is a beautiful girl, her major problem is her lack of self esteem.. which has led to all this……

 

Airlie Girl, I love you from here to the moon and back. Please get well soon..

Luv Mum

xoxo

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Thursday 24 March 2011

another day…

another rejection.

 

ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TRULY enough

 

I am reading a book called “Make Miracles in Forty Days” by Melody Beattie.

 

I am turning my life around.

 

Thank you my friends for your love and support.

It is truly appreciated. I must move forward from here, there is no other way.

 

Just the knowledge that there is something I can do is life changing.

empowerment is starting to creep in.

hope is rising…..

 

it will all be very different - SOON!!!

ALL because of me.

I am powerful beyond measure

 

thank you

xoxo

Wednesday 23 March 2011

Yep……

“How do I feel?

Abandoned actually.....

Abandoned by my art.....

Abandoned by my friends......

Abandoned by my family......

Abandoned by my mother......

Kind of weird really because I am still here for all of you.....

as always

Maybe it's my turn to be the victim for a change?

Just sayin'.....

PFT....

Maybe it's just time to see things clearly.”

Posted today by my friend Michelle

I totally understand. Like I said to her, I could have posted this myself…

My life this last few weeks has been one rejection/abandonment after another.

And like Michelle, have been there for them.

Sad

It comes down to respect, and humility. Appreciation of others and willingness to go just that little bit further.

 

It appears that a huge change is afoot. A new age is dawning, and bullshit doesn't cut it any more. Lets get real people. Lets recognise the divinity in each other, not just break our own arm banging our own drum. Lets appreciate what has been done for/given to us, honour that, and attempt to respond in kind. If a real friend is suffering, then lend a hand or pat a shoulder.  Self given trophies do not mean much.

 

The last few weeks have been working full time… this always does me in. I need some ‘me’ time. Oh goddess, how i need some ‘me’ time. Ex has been working weekends too for the past few weeks so has not had the kids. I am in burnout mode. Burnt out and rejected is not a good look. And quite painful really…

 

Am just trying to get through the next two weeks, til the next school holidays. I will have TWO WEEKS OFF!!!! oh bliss oh bliss oh bliss. I am sooooo looking forward to this. Oh yes. I want what she is having.. lol

gotta laugh

if not, i will cry….. oops