What do you do
What do you do with a kid that is dropping out of school because of 'social' reasons. Who is within 18 months of finishing Year 12. Who has reached the end of Term 1 this year and says she isnt going back.
She is hating school with a passion. She has been struggling to drag herself every day so far this year. I have to admit that I was doubtful whether she would even start the year. I thought that if she got there and found it wasnt as scary as she thought, she might finish. She is not an academic kid. She gets good marks because she works really really hard. Her marks are good, but she is far from the top of the class. High average I would say.
So she was never going to be a brain surgeoun.
She has quite bad self esteem She is extremely self conscious and has a melt down if things arent perfect. ( and they often arent, due to her high standards) She judges herself mercilessly and cannot cope with the slightest embarrasment.
But what will become of her now.
She is without motivation. She is down on herself. She has closed up and will not talk about it. At all. She is influenced by older friends. Friends that have already finished school (or dropped out previously).
This is more then me trying to 'control'.
This has far reaching consequences. Not least financial ones.
I see her chances of getting a job pretty slim. Due mainly to the fact of her poor attendance record over the last few months. I see her sitting on her arse watching movies day in - day out. I see that REALLY REALLY pissing me off.
I wish she had a passion and was out to pursue it. I wish she had a passion.
She seems apathetic and lazy. Motivationless and angry.
I have put into place consequences to these actions and that is fine. It is a cost she is willing to pay (now!!, will see later on)
It is my head that is trapped in the endless 'what if's'. My mind that fruitlessly seeks conclusion. I detest situations that are left hanging. I want to know how things will pan out and I want to know NOW!!!!!!!
Control freak issues.... yes probably
This is my baby. My first baby that I love with all of my heart.
I so do not want to see her throw her life away. It is hers to throw, I know. But in the meantime, it will affect each and every one of us here in the family. Thats not fair.
She is worth soooo much more.
But, you cant put an old head on young shoulders.
We have all (well most of us... well at least ME anyway) made mistakes. We have made errors of judgement. And who knows, what may seem like a mistake now, may turn out to be the best thing that has ever happened to her. Sigh. I hope so.
I just want her to be happy and me not to be stressed.
And YES Lisa, I am taking my tablets.
P.S. - (For my non Australian readers, school starts here in the last week of January for the school year. We have four 10 week terms, with roughly two week breaks in between. And then about a 6 week break at christmas (our summer). Kids start kinder at age 5, then go through years 1 - 12. After that is further education if desired. Years 11 and 12 are not 'compulsory' but in this day and age, you really need them to be competitive in the job market, my daughter has just made it to the end of term 1 of year 11)