Crisis averted....

wow - what a hairy ride it has been the last few days. We have all survived, 'just' for some. 

I guess I sometimes find it hard to be the person with whom the buck always stops... I have (as have most of us really) made some really hard choices for this life - and if I wasnt able to cope with it, I wouldnt have chosen it.

I totally get that.

That doesnt stop me from melodramatically belly flopping face down in the pile of shit that is usually in front of me. I have become adept at spotting, and leaping over, shovelling away, or skirting around that shit, but sometimes... for whatever reason, I just give up and take a big flying leap right into the middle of it. 

Sometimes it is just tooo bloody hard, and I dont know what to do, or think, or say, or not say, or not think, or not do..... hmmmm

Sometimes it just feels like I am soooooooooo alone - which of course I am - but at the same time I am surrounded by beautiful loving people.

If some that I know want to be ignorant, selfish shits, then let them.

My there is a lot of shit in this post , isnt there??



Renata is right..... its a very deep week.


I must just remain mindful - and not forget and slip back to non action or denial..... hmmmm

going now

group tonight. am armed with a frock and a bottle of fanny drops...... goody :)

thanks guys
what would I do without you??

xoxo