another day…

another rejection.

 

ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TRULY enough

 

I am reading a book called “Make Miracles in Forty Days” by Melody Beattie.

 

I am turning my life around.

 

Thank you my friends for your love and support.

It is truly appreciated. I must move forward from here, there is no other way.

 

Just the knowledge that there is something I can do is life changing.

empowerment is starting to creep in.

hope is rising…..

 

it will all be very different - SOON!!!

ALL because of me.

I am powerful beyond measure

 

thank you

xoxo

Yep……

“How do I feel?

Abandoned actually.....

Abandoned by my art.....

Abandoned by my friends......

Abandoned by my family......

Abandoned by my mother......

Kind of weird really because I am still here for all of you.....

as always

Maybe it's my turn to be the victim for a change?

Just sayin'.....

PFT....

Maybe it's just time to see things clearly.”

Posted today by my friend Michelle

I totally understand. Like I said to her, I could have posted this myself…

My life this last few weeks has been one rejection/abandonment after another.

And like Michelle, have been there for them.

Sad

It comes down to respect, and humility. Appreciation of others and willingness to go just that little bit further.

 

It appears that a huge change is afoot. A new age is dawning, and bullshit doesn't cut it any more. Lets get real people. Lets recognise the divinity in each other, not just break our own arm banging our own drum. Lets appreciate what has been done for/given to us, honour that, and attempt to respond in kind. If a real friend is suffering, then lend a hand or pat a shoulder.  Self given trophies do not mean much.

 

The last few weeks have been working full time… this always does me in. I need some ‘me’ time. Oh goddess, how i need some ‘me’ time. Ex has been working weekends too for the past few weeks so has not had the kids. I am in burnout mode. Burnt out and rejected is not a good look. And quite painful really…

 

Am just trying to get through the next two weeks, til the next school holidays. I will have TWO WEEKS OFF!!!! oh bliss oh bliss oh bliss. I am sooooo looking forward to this. Oh yes. I want what she is having.. lol

gotta laugh

if not, i will cry….. oops

Life is about relations with others

Not self. There are COPIOUS opportunities on high to be connected with Self. It is here on earth that we need to connect with others. If we cannot connect with others, i.e. we have conflict with spouse, offspring, friends, extended family, etc. then we seriously have to look inside for what is causing this conflict. Otherwise we might as well just take our bat and ball and go home??

Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself that you tasted as many as you could. 

~ Louise Erdrich 

So much of life is going on and on around me right now. I am trying desperately to cling to some sense of calm, and reason and stay like a rock. I am also standing as strong as I can as waves of insecurity wash over my as an attack on my personal self after leaving my ex almost 12 months ago. It seems I have finally come out of some kind of fog.... resentment is raising its ugly head right now.....

My very core is emphasising, during all of this, that is our relations with others that is key. We are here on this earth to relate to others and to perfect our relating skills on a personal level, as this is unavailable to us on high.  A huge part of our learning here on this plane is about relationships and how we deal with the integration of our own energies in relation to those that are close to us. 

I am working very very hard to maintain and enhance those relations that are healthy for me right now, and those that are not conducive to my personal growth are dropping off all by themselves...

This is a good thing as it shows the progress I am making on a deeply personal level. 

I am working really hard to make sure that in some way I am moving forward each day. 

One step at a time.........

Much love

Jen

xoxo

Gee, that was fun!!

I was fluffing and fiddling around with the blog. Wanted to create a new look.


Might add a post later, and some of my more recent photos...

Off to finish cooking dinner now,

taa taa for now

xoxo

“Look mummy, its a PRINCESS!!!”

This post is about one week late. I am sooo slack I know. Better late than never, right??

The above quote was exclaimed (very loudly!!) from our front verandah about 12 years ago by my middle child Kira, after she had caught a glimpse of our next door neighbours daughter as a bride leaving for her wedding.

Last Tuesday afternoon I was very proud of my very own ‘princess’. It was Kira herself at her Year 10 formal. We spent the afternoon at hair appointments and getting ready to leave for the night of her life so far. I was so proud of her

 

 

I was very very proud of how my beautiful girl conducted herself that afternoon - she most certainly was a princess.

Love you Kira

xoxoxo