Friday, 17 September 2010

cold

I have never felt something so cold. Cold and like marble. Cold and at peace. Finally out of pain. Finally able to run and jump and dance. Finally happy. After sooooo long.

I love you so much mum.

I am sorry.

I made mistakes and i want you to know that i had no intention of hurting you. I wish I could have been there for you in your last moments. But I take comfort in knowing that you didn't know what hit you. That you were gone before you even knew what was going on. If at all.

I have worried about you for longer than I can remember. Now you are gone, I feel a void that I don't know how to fill.

 

Oh and the kids. They are shattered. They have all written something for you. I know you already know.

RIP.

You will be missed more than you will ever know.

xoxoxoxxooxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxooxoxoxoxooxoooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxo

4 comments:

Wendy said...

Jen, I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending love to you and your family and sending blessings as your mum moves onto her next phase. She will always be with you in your heart x♥x

Michelle said...

I think that the shock of that cold empty is something that takes time to pass. First to be recognised and then to be acknowledged and then to creep up on you and surprise you on a regular basis and then maybe, maybe to pass into some other thing eventually.

But I don't really know, I'm still being surprised.

Love you Jen

xxx

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

I'm so sorry about your loss, and your kids' loss. xoxo

Jen said...

Thank you very much. I really have appreciated your support.
It truly has been hard for the kids Florida, really has. But they are getting it together now.... i guess there will still be 'surprise' moments...
thanks again xo