Monday 28 March 2011

my baby girl

oh my baby
i love you sooo much, from here to the moon and back an infinity times.
I stand by your bedside and i see you there, all filled with tubes and wires and needles and I feel absolutely distraught. You are there, with all those strangers, who are catering for your every need. Who are wiping your mouth, and smoothing your brow. Who are there when you are distressed and there when you are content.
I call in.. around the times i can due to work… because if i didn't work then i couldn't pay the rent. So I work, and i go there and i feel sooooo small. I feel soooooo helpless. My love for you isn't enough. It always used to be. Now not at all.
You are paying a huge price for the choice to be an individual. You are totally unique and this was a way for you to express that. It has gone horribly wrong.
I would swap places with you in an instant. I would give all i had for you to be well and happy. You are my world. You are my life. You are my everything. Along with your sister and brother, you are my reason for being.

The news this evening is a little more encouraging. It seems that the swelling is due to an allergic reaction. So, we just wait for the body to give up fighting…. it seems it is already giving up the fight, with a tiny improvement in swelling this evening. Her nurse said he could see a gap in her mouth, between her tongue and the roof of her mouth, that wasn't there at 1pm today. So this is good. The specialist called in, had a feel around, and said she thought the swelling had reduced a bit too.
HOPEFULLY she has turned a corner.
I am SURE it is to do with the outpouring of love and healing and best wishes that is coming from everywhere right now. Keep up the good work guys. it is making a difference.
Thank you so much
from the bottom of all our hearts
thank you
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
DSCF1717
Airlie and her bestie Stace xoxo

7 comments:

Kim said...

I'm so sorry for this challenging time. My prayers are with you!

janis said...

Jen~
Continuing to pray.
Thank you for the update. When our child hurts we hurt, and we would do anything to make the child no longer hurt. That I do understand. Even when the child is 22. Friday, as my daughter was telling me of her crisis and crying her heart out, I would have done anything to fix it.
Airlie is in good hands. It sounds encouraging. Im so sorry for her pain. I will continue to keep her, and you in my prayers. {{hugs}}

Jen said...

i just talked to her new nurse Jo, she sounds awesome, and she is really confident that she is improving slowly and steadily. Keep the love and healing thoughts coming, you are making the world of difference!! Thank you from the bottom of our hearts xoxoxo

Jen said...

thanks heaps kim, we can do with all the prayers we can get xoxo

Jen said...

thank you so much Janis.... it is truly an awful time, but hopefully
we can look forward to a time of increadible peace after this... :)

Jen said...

some good news!! Just called the nurse back this morning and she said the swelling has reduced significantly overnight!! She can see the back of her tongue now, where before there was no gap between her tongue and the roof of her mouth. Her temp is now low grade too!! She still has a swelling under her chin, which is directly under the piercing - so yeah, woo hoo!!! some really good news!!
Thank you so much
xoxoxo

Wendy said...

She's a fighter - wonder where she gets that from...? *wink*